Building Confidence
7 Ways You Can Feel More Confident About Yourself Now
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
This is the stuff that builds character, commitment, and confidence! No one wants a crisis but, out of them, ordinary people become heroes–and you are one of them. We are constrained, on an economic wild ride and dealing with the kiddos, puppies and old people who just won’t listen while we keep people from running off course.
Don’t sell yourself short. Think about all the things you have done that you would have said just a couple months ago were impossible. I’d like you to recognize this and build on it.
We allow people to tie us up when we lack confidence. This is a real deterrent to our well-being and our productivity and achievement as human beings. Consider this quote:
“How can any man enter a strong man’s house and carry off his possessions unless he first ties up the strong man. Then he can plunder his house.”
- Matthew 12:29
Don’t let anyone tie you up.
Here are 7 things that can boost your confidence:
1. Do something that is good for you but scares you every day.
The first time you do anything can be daunting. If it’s something that is a breakthrough task, ask someone who’s already done it to come alongside and see you through it.
There are life-changing effects of accomplishing something you didn’t imagine you could from running a half marathon to completing your CFP designation. When you conquer a break-through project or feat, your subconscious mind kicks into high confidence mode. Even if it’s as simple as making that call, it will help.
“There’s nothing better for building confidence than learning you can do something you thought you couldn’t.”
2. Create an I-Did-It list.
Think of those times you already did this. If we spend a little time on our I-Did-It list, I think our To-Do list would be a little less daunting.
3. Give yourself an attaboy or attagirl.
Reward yourself for your achievement. There are plenty of times when we do something even bigger than tackling the AMPF program or completing a triathlon but don’t get the designation or the medal. Recognizing your achievement yourself is an okay thing to do. It may even be more meaningful when you can get internal satisfaction without the applause.
4. Set yourself up for success.
Put that one thing at the top of your list each day. Lay out the equipment needed, whether it’s a pen or a pair of running shoes, the night before. Ask someone to hold you accountable. Give yourself a pep talk; go get ‘em!
5. Create boundaries.
You can put guard rails in your calendar. Block the time to do the project. Learn to politely say “no” to distractions. Don’t let lesser tasks take over the greater good; it will happen if you let it. Build walls that will allow you to focus, from turning off your phone to getting someone to block and tackle for you. Let them cover your calls for that hour or return the call to tell the person you are not available.
6. Eliminate negative-self talk.
No one gets better by beating themselves up. You need to hold every thought captive. When you are down on yourself, figure out how to work your way out of it. Do you need to apologize to someone, forgive someone, fix something you did that was wrong? Do it and move on. Don’t keep ruminating on it.
7. Ask questions.
We want to become more confident, but never an arrogant know-it-all. Stay open to learning from others and have the confidence to ask questions that will help you learn. Don’t be fearful of people recognizing that you don’t have all the answers. This is the sign of someone with true vs false confidence.
I hope you will move through this crisis with confidence and conviction that you are here for a purpose and you are equipped for success. We are here to support you and add tools that will continue to build your skills and confidence.
If you have any questions, please contact one of our coaches, Kris Hartland.
About the Author
Bernie DeLaRosa, CFP®, ChFC®, CRPC®, CLU®, APMA®, CASL®, BFA™
Managing Business Consultant
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